UPDATE : 2019.12.5 Thu 23:42
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Dating violence: Be careful about your partner!Love, Violence; That is the Problem
These days, many cases of violence between lovers receive news coverage. This is called dating violence. Dating violence is physical assault, financial crime, verbal abuse, rape, or psychological violence within a couple. Generally, a male and a female meet and they fall in love. However one of them may become scared of the other person, because they find their partner developing violent patterns of behavior. When this change begins, they should find a way to quit their relationship or deal with such behavior.
Dating violence is very dangerous, because it can be considered a part of love. It can cause more serious problems such as murder if people neglect it, not knowing that it is a crime. According to a survey, even though a third of people have experienced dating violence, there are many cases when they do not realize they are experiencing abuse or they think dating violence and love exist in isolation. When they are asked the reason why they did not break up with their partner after experiencing violence, they say that it is not severe enough to decide to separate from their lover, and that they love their boyfriend or girlfriend, although they also have some faults. The majority of victims facilitate the violence believing that they can change their assailants by the power of love.
Patterns of dating violence are the following. The first one is the type of forcing a one-way physical relationship or sexual relations. Physical contact should be done with the couple’s implicit consent. If it happens under one person’s pressure, it may be a crime. The victims need to recognize the forcibleness themselves. The second type involves watching the partner’s every movement. This causes the victim mental stress and makes him or her unsettled. They have to report their daily activities. If this situation continues, their private life disappears and they undergo social phobia. The third case is violence by using words which can make the partner feel sexual humiliation or insult. It is an especially dangerous problem, because it can develop into physical violence. The last type is direct physical assault. It is the worst thing. In the beginning, the attacker may throw something, which is a common occurrence in relations between partners. Most attackers cause violence in the drunken condition, and then phone to ask for the victims’ forgiveness the next day. When you experience such situations, there are some ways you can be rescued.
To cope with dating violence, the victims must take positive action. First, refuse undesired sexual behavior adamantly. When you recognize a trifling sign, you should ask your partner to stop such behavior. Be careful about frequent checking of your private life in various ways like messages, social network services, etc. Furthermore, do not become mentally weak if the attacker begs forgiveness for their acts. The patterns will continue repeatedly. After experiencing physical violence, go to the hospital and collect evidence by taking pictures of injuries on your body. Dating violence cannot be justified by any reason. Remember this problem could become your problem!

Jo Young-in  youngwon13@naver.com

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