A new Korean law will soon take effect. Said law will require that all foreign nationals coming into Korea submit to fingerprinting and have their mugshots taken. In addition, a blood and hair sample will be taken for DNA analysis. All foreigners will now be required to wear ankle monitoring devices and report on a regular basis to their assigned government probation officer. Finally, provisions are in the works to have barcodes tattooed and electronic devices surgically implanted in all foreigners for easier tracking.

When asked whether this new policy would exasperate this already-precariously negative image of Korea, most officials would simply scoff it off. “Frankly, we don’t understand what all the objection is about. I would think all those foreigner visitors and workers would be grateful that we were thinking so much about them,” said a government official on the condition of anonymity.

“Actually, we are very concerned about these workers. Not a day goes by that we are not thinking about how to more effectively alienate them. Not only that, but we are providing these foreigners with the ankle-bracelets and the prison uniforms. They should be grateful they will not have to pay for this out of their own pockets.”

Meanwhile, Korean human rights organizations are suggesting that this policy will foster mistrust, resentment, and generally negative feelings in the ever-increasing foreign populace. Said one human rights attorney, “We are especially concerned about the financial aspects of this policy.

Perhaps more importantly, it would cause an undue burden on the Korean citizens who must finance this program. It is unfair to ask the everyday worker to shoulder this financial responsibility.” Korea, is it just me, or are we not welcomed in your country? I thought we were buddies. It’s kind of like inviting someone to your house and having a rent-a-cop following you around (even to the bathroom) to make sure you don’t steal anything. Gives you a warm, glowing feeling, doesn’t it? Take that with a grain of salt.

‘Stanford Wells’ is a name as a writer not real name.

Stanford Wells  -

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